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In 2006 I was working as a theatre producer in the UK, and I was presenting a show at Adelaide Fringe festival called The Bogus Woman starring British actor Sarah Niles. I was standing outside the theatre in Adelaide when I first spotted Nick. He was with a mutual friend, Eliza, who introduced us.
We made eye contact and I was immediately drawn to him. I thought Nick was extremely handsome; I remember his beautiful hands and his gorgeous thick hair. It turned out we shared a lot of mutual friends, as Nick was an actor. Eliza later told me she had a premonition that me and Nick were going to fall in love and get married – this was before gay marriage was even legalised in the UK.
A few days later, I started making inquiries to friends about who Nick was. I asked one to call Nick and tell him I wanted to go out on a date with him.
I’ll never forget our first walk through the Persian Garden on the banks of the River Torrens in Adelaide. At one point we were both laying together on a Persian rug and I was falling pretty head over heels in love or lust, or both. It was opening night of the festival and there were so many friends there but I only wanted to be with him.
Meanwhile, the show I was working on became one of the biggest successes of the festival – more than 4,000 people attended. Although we were both very busy – Nick was a festival judge seeing many shows, I remember how he would make himself available around my schedule, which I found really amazing. He’d just meet me at the end of the show, or sit with me at the right moments.
As feelings between us grew, something else came up. When he spoke I sensed that he was a little sad and stressed as he knew I was leaving. I said, “let’s just feel this”. Let’s not stop what we are feeling because I have to leave. I knew we would find a way to make this work.
The night before leaving, I sat down and wrote a marriage proposal. Nick now jokingly calls it my business proposition. I asked him to marry me 10 days after we met. And he said yes.
The next day I was going to Sydney, then back to the UK. When we went to the airport with our families and said goodbye I felt so sad to be leaving him. I knew we’d found something real.
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We then spent a few months separated from each other, but when I went back to my life in England we would speak daily.
Gay partnership had just been legalised in the UK and the Gay Times had a competition to win a civil partnership ceremony. Nick entered the competition – he had a gut instinct that we had a good chance.
Then, very early one morning, Nick called me and passed on the incredible news that we’d won – he was so excited. Nick decided to move to the UK and so we could be married. It all felt so right!
The wedding was beautiful. We had a penthouse suite, 30 friends came including Sarah from the show, who sang for us. My 18-month-old niece was the flower girl. My sister came over as did Nick’s mum and stepdad. There was a ceremony, a five-course dinner and then a cocktail party in our room on the Thames. I remember the hotel’s housekeeper walking into our room in the morning and saying: “Oh my God, what has happened here?”
Now we are about to go into our 20th year together. Nick is an incredibly supportive partner – we are constantly on the move around the world. His capacity to support me in my career has been really amazing. We have two cats and a little chihuahua named Ziggy. When you’ve been with someone that long you really get to know that person’s needs and learn to be flexible. We love discovering new cities and new places together, and doing that with someone you love is pretty special.
We didn’t know each other that well when we got married, so it is quite amazing that we’ve been together so long. We took the plunge early on. We were both so ready for that unconditional love – it was the right timing for both of us.
