The moment I knew: it was tender but complicated – then we decided not to hide any more

1 day ago 10

I discovered a passion for mountaineering in 2000 on a technical climbing course in New Zealand. For two decades I dedicated my life to the mountains, climbing some of the world’s highest peaks including Everest.

In early 2022 my marriage ended and I threw myself completely into my dream of climbing the world’s 14 highest peaks without supplemental oxygen. By September I reached Manaslu base camp in Nepal. I was focused on the mountain ahead, not on love.

That’s where I met Mikel. He was working at base camp as a guide, helping his client while I climbed with another Sherpa. For days it poured with rain and none of us could move higher. We had to wait out the weather. Mikel kept stealing my umbrella and teasing me about it. I loved his free spirit – he was confident, outgoing, funny and unafraid to speak his mind. He had a bright, cheeky energy and made everyone around him laugh.

One night we were sitting in the dining tent watching Nepali music clips on his phone. The rain pattered on the tent roof, the glow from his screen lit up his smile and I felt an unexpected warmth. At some point we kissed. Later that night he came to my tent. Because he was working, he had to slip out before dawn so no one would know.

For a while it was our secret – a stolen kiss, a quiet laugh across the camp, whispered conversations beneath the sound of rain. It was tender but complicated. I was newly separated and Mikel is 15 years younger than me. I didn’t know if it was real or a fleeting mountain romance.

The following year I was in Pakistan, preparing to climb K2, and Mikel was there too, guiding another client. When I landed in Skardu he met me at the airport. We went back to the hotel where he was staying with another Sherpa and immediately decided we would share a room, just the two of us. That was the moment we decided not to hide any more. We were simply together and everyone knew.

At first I was afraid of what people might think – of our age gap, of how different our worlds seemed. But then I realised that, out of all the people on the planet, we had found each other. It is an unlikely love but the truest love I have ever known.

Since then we’ve climbed seven 8,000-metre peaks together. Mikel is devoted to helping me achieve my dream. On the mountain he does everything he can to keep me safe: carrying heavy loads, making hard decisions and calmly guiding me. We live an adventurous life but when we are together we are at peace. Nothing feels too hard for us, not even scaling the highest peaks on Earth.

We have a little saying: “I love me, you love you, we love each other, and we both love the mountain.” It reminds us that we share an even greater love.