Jess Cartner-Morley: ladylike fashion is back, but it’s been given a modern twist

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This is what ladylike looks like now. Feminine pastels to catch the eye and set a certain tone? Tick. A tailored jacket to win over the maitre d’? On it. A brooch? Present and correct. A neat handbag, a demure silhouette, a lick of lace to dress things up? Check, check, check.

Ladylike is about looking as though you mean business, but prefer that business to be done over a dover sole, a good glass of white and a side order of spicy gossip. Ladylike clothes have a fashion revival every few years because the attitude they represent – charming, but steely – has an evergreen appeal. Ladylike is not be underestimated, and has never looked better than in the latest fashion iteration. When it feels this modern, what’s not to love?

If you thought neat sweaters, faux fur stoles, cute skirts and charming vintage jewellery were over, think again. Ladylike fashion is back in a big way. I try not to bang on about catwalk shows too much in these columns because I feel they are best not taken too literally, but the Miu Miu autumn 2025 collection, shown in Paris earlier this year, was a watershed moment for ladylike. The cloche hats and slip dresses, and bullet bras poking out proud under sheer pastel sweaters, were deliciously retro and bracingly up to date at the same time.

I’m not seriously suggesting stoles and bullet bras for the school run. Catwalk fashion is always best consumed with a hefty pinch of salt. But there were lots of details in that Miu Miu show that are genuinely useful hacks for making ladylike fashion feel modern. An unexpected shoe or sock – or both – goes a long way towards bringing a look that can feel stuck in the 20th century racing into the 21st. A loafer instead of a dainty slingback or ballet flat brings a pleasing “don’t-mess” grounded heft to the silhouette, but still feels in character for clothes that are proper and preppy. Or you could wear a kitten heel, but with a ribbed sock.

A model on a catwalk wearing a black cloche hat, a long-sleeved brown top, a silky skirt, knee socks and loafers, and carrying a handbag and a fur stole
The Miu Miu autumn/winter 2025 show. Photograph: Victor Boyko/Getty Images

Ladylike is often underestimated as a vibe because its tone is softly spoken and doesn’t shout over people to be heard. But while ladylike is feminine, it is not merely decorative. Ladylike is polite, but it is not a pushover. It has the quiet power that is commanded by having good manners. There is a rigour to ladylike posture: legs demurely crossed at the ankle when sitting, yes, but more importantly, back straight and chin up.

Key to making ladylike look modern is that your outfit should have an element that is quite solid and sturdy. Resist the social conditioning that tells you to try to look delicate. Balance flimsy elements – a lace-trim skirt – with something that stands its ground like a chunky knit or a blazer. Have fun with colour. This is one of the best things about the ladylike trend. These clothes work really well in slightly bonkers pastels: lime, lilac, that sort of thing. Avoid fussing too much about matchy-matchy colour coordination or you will start to look a bit like an Easter egg, which is not where we are going with this. Instead, mix pastels with regular colours – lime with blue-jean blue, bubblegum pink with burgundy, lilac with chocolate brown.

This version of ladylike doesn’t take it too seriously. Polka dots are very much the vibe: they always look smart, but they also make you smile. A polka dot silk dress with a chunky boot, perhaps. One of the nice things about wearing clothes that have a certain formality of pitch to them – tweed jackets, polka dot silks, lace‑edged skirts – is that you have scope to add a little messiness. To knock the edges off, if you know what I mean. Instead of wearing one pretty necklace, you could wear three of different lengths. I might experiment with a proper, structured handbag, and if I do, I’m not ruling out adding a bag charm or two. Ladies: shall we lunch?

Model: Ellen at Body London. Hair and make up: Delilah Blakeney using Colour Wow and Nars. Jacket, £109.99, Mango. Jumper, £24, and skirt, £34, both Asos. Brooch, £75, Essential Antwerp. Shoes, £250, Russell and Bromley. Bag, £27.99, and earrings, £9.99, both H&M

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